Down 1.2 - Totaling 18.2

I'm pretty excited for this weeks loss.  I can honestly say I haven't put my best foot forward in following the program - although I realize making better decisions regarding food is coming easier. I'm finding my "need" for comfort in food is fewer and fewer every week.  I'm truly starting to feel the freedom of this bondage of overeating or eating for wrong reasons.

Although this week Ive done better than the last two weeks with the program and I'm back with The Lords Table study DAILY - I realize I have maybe put in 70% of my efforts.  So as I reflect on this past week I'm seeking to see what worked.  What were those good decisions made that I can do again in the future.

1. I walked - more so in the beginning of this week than the later - but I walked 2 or 3 days in the last 7 days - for about 20 minutes (i.e., 1 mile).  This I did with the intent on getting in "some" exercise.  I'm slowly getting back into this without pushing too hard - I'm trying very hard to not re-injure my knee or foot.

2. I've stopped myself on a few occasions when Ive been alone and bored from going into the kitchen.  How you may ask?  Well 1st I turned off my TV (this seems to be my trigger), 2nd I prayed - asked GOD to take this temptation away, and 3rd I sought GOD's word.  I can say that this worked for me at least 4 times in the last week.

3. I started drinking decaffinated green tea at night.  I'm not sure if this is related at all, a few things Ive read indicate it enhances weight loss - not sure if this is true or not, but I'll keep doing it and as long as I am losing weight - I'll give it some credit as well.

4.  My accountability partners - Kimberly and Melissa.  They asked me regularly how I'm doing and if Ive gotten my exercise in.  We talk daily about our struggles with food and life and really support each other thru this journey.  I remain honest with them at all times and I am sure it has stopped me from going to the kitchen when I'm not hungry because I don't want to have to confess it afterwards.  God sure gave me some amazing women to keep me accountable. 

5. Better decisions of what I'm eating.  The other day I got a smaller plate (instead of the regular size plate) and put my dinner on that.  The plate looked full and I ate it.  I didn't feel cheated - its totally all in my head apparently. I did this a few times this week - and will probably do it more this week.

I'm sure there is more - but this is all I can think of at this point.  This weeks challenge I gave my bible study group of ladies and I'm doing myself is to be joyful in EVERYTHING I do.  In regards to my eating - I'm going to slow down while I eat.  Be thankful for every bite - savor the tastes - and glorify HIM for providing it to me.  Every Bite!! That's my challenge.

I challenge you as well - to be joyful - in EVERYTHING you do.  Even the dishes we clean - lets be joyful we have those dishes to clean.

At this very moment I am joyful for the ability to write from my heart.  I am joyful for you who are reading this.

Until next week,
Blessings INDEED~~
Debbie

Lost what I gained last week - down 0.4lbs

Well this week I lost what I gained last week.  I'm thankful for this.  It's been a strange week for me.  Lots of "stuff" going on that has nothing to do with this journey.  But its kept me occupied on everything but getting back on the program.  I realized the other "stuff" is not my "stuff" but I'm caring it like it is.  Anything to keep me not focused on my journey and get back on the program. This week is short and sweet -

       ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!!  No more excuses for me.  I must stay focused on what God has planned for me - and that is to glorify Him through his Temple (my body).  Being busy - regardless of what Im busing doing - is not an excuse to not be focused on what I'm eating (points with WW) and doing my daily study (The Lords Table).  I WILL walk more this week - at least 3-4 times for 20 minutes.

Ok.. that is all.. my challenges are set.  Hope you all have an amazing week ahead of you!!

Until then...Blessings INDEED,
Debbie 

Had my first UP week!!

This past week was my first "up" week - although not by much - only 0.4lbs.  That's less than a half pound -  and for the past few weeks Ive had- I'll take it!! I realize it could have been worse - MUCH WORSE!! I've completely gone off the program - been watchful and all, and obviously made some good decisions - but haven't tracked food or been consistent with The Lords Table study either.

On Saturday morning I woke up discouraged.  My knee flared up again.  Hasn't flaired up since I first started losing weight.  So it was discouraging because I have continued to lose weight and I was hopeful the flair ups were due to my [over]weight - but now I realize there could be something else wrong.  I'm making a doctors appointment today. 

As I was in the midst of this discouragement I realized that I was totally struggling with a few things:

 (1) With getting back on the program.  I know I need to - but actually doing it is a struggle. My determination will overcome this struggle - I am confident of this.  I wont allow this to be the end of it for me.  I truly want to be free of this ongoing struggle Ive had for years.

 (2) Getting back motivated in my study with The Lords Table or even consistently being in the Word every day.  I'm finding myself "allowing" myself to go back to the kitchen - to eat more food - even when I'm not hungry.  I realize as I'm writing that my focus is returning back to me and off of God.  "I" don't want to get back on the program; "I" don't want to do the study; "I" don't have time; "I" want to eat, etc. etc. etc. I have to remember that my goal is to glorify God in my eating and to break free from the sin of gluttony [lack of self-disciple with food]. And finally,

(3) I have an emotional pain with this commitment to not overeat. This is interesting to me.  My stomach has changed physically with not eating as much - and at first that was painful - the growling, etc.  But now that its used to it it no longer has that pain per se.  But my emotional pain is something different - something deeper I think. Emotionally I miss eating as I wish.  Scripture says in order to cease from sin there will be some suffering (1Peter 4:1-2). That with this suffering  the will of God will set me free from these habitual desires.  My hope lies in this.  My struggles/suffering are nothing compared to what Jesus endured for us on the cross.  Today I pick up my own cross - struggles, accomplishments, and HOPE to accomplish HIS will. 

Rejoice - I say it again REJOICE!!
Debbie

Life Changing Week for me...

I can say this week was one of those life changing weeks that I will forever remember.  As most of you know my father passed away last Thursday (soon after I posted last weeks post).  It was sudden because he wasn't sick per se - but not totally unexpected due to his unhealthy lifestyle. I'm thankful he is no longer in pain - physically or mentally.  This gives me the ability to say good-by with a peaceful heart. 

I think the most interesting part about this week is that I didn't turn to food. I admit I didn't track my food - nor did I really pay attention to what I was eating.  I haven't done my study either in a few days.   BUT.. what I didn't do was go on an eating binge. I did eat a few bags of chips here and there - but that was really the extent of "over-eating" or eating not because I was hungry but to fill in a void of sadness. This is pretty huge for me.  I actually had no desire to turn to food. I'm sure some of this is because my dad was so unhealthy and battled his own desires with food as well.  His heart stopped because it couldn't handle his weight I'm sure.  Not to sound insensitive at all, but it was confirmation for me to continue on this journey.  I realize that I was heading down this road myself with how I treated my body with food. 

All that being said, I was fully expecting to gain a pound or two because I was completely off the program. Once again I was surprised when she said I lost 1.8lbs this week - totaling 27 lbs. 

So I decided something just as I am writing this blog today.  I am losing weight and finally going to overcome this addiction I have with food for a few reasons:
  1. To glorify God. I love serving Him and I know I can do so much more for His Kingdom if I am healthy.
 2.  To be healthy for me and my family - I want to see Sydney grow and have children herself and I want to grow old with Justin,
 3.  To honor my dad.  I wish he would have lost the weight and took better care of himself while he was alive - so I am going to do it for the both of us. I am determined to be pain free in my knees, hips and back that was due to my over-weight.  Pain free is something my Dad hasn't felt for years.  I will feel it for the both of us. 

I know my Dad is in heaven with his new body - dancing, running and completely pain free.  I am so thankful for this.  I too will feel this freedom one day - hopefully while I'm here on earth as I continue on this journey. 

Today I feel inspired by my Dad. 

Until next time, Blessings INDEED~~
Deb